Camp Goodbye

jack

Camp Goodbye

Will he be alright?
Will he be happy?
Will he make any friends?
Will he eat?
Will he brush his teeth?
Will he…
Will he…

This morning was a very early one;
Yet no alarm was needed.
He woke feeling sick, but pushed through it.
We woke feeling sick, but smiled through it.
We rode to the airport going over last minute details.
He rode to the airport with headphones on, hearing some of them.
He was strong.
So was Susan mostly.
So was I, but for one tear when he went through security and out of sight.

We know he’ll be alright.
We know he’ll be happy.
We know he’ll make some friends and eat… and maybe brush.

My heart feels like its belt just got tightened.
The house is too quiet since a loud lovable piece of our world is away.
He will sleep in a new bed tonight.
Surrounded by boys and noise and we hope much laughter and some growth.
But boy, do I miss him so.

A Hand to Hold

susan eric handsA toast to my wife, Susan.
A birthday is just another day I know.
Yet it does subtly turn the page on what’s been quite a year.

A year of sad untethering when your father’s breath was stilled.
A year of tremendous growth both literally and figuratively for your unique son.
A year of watching your intrepid daughter learning to fly as a cheerleader while continuing to stretch her wings as a young woman.
A year of continued success for you in your career.

I let my mind wander and gaze at our lives in the hazy future.
Where will our children go now that they stand at the start of their great maze with untold turns to endless possible destinations.
Even our own road is shrouded in the mist.
Who will we meet?
What will we do?
Where will we go?
When will we get there?
How will we add to the world?
All queries whose full answers we can only glimpse through a very cloudy prism.

The only part I do see with crystal clear clarity is my hand tightly grasping yours as we walk down the path together.
Walking, not into the sunset, but into the sunshine.
Walking, not to an easy chair, but into the adventure.
Walking, not in circles living a well worn story, but in great happy strides as we chart our own reality.

Here’s to you today Susan.
I love you. Happy birthday.
And thank you for holding my hand.

Changing Traffic Patterns

Due to road degradation, new construction or for some reason to help (hopefully) the greater good, city planners will force cars to go on different streets from the drivers’ habitual ways. These “changing traffic patterns” initially cause great frustration and stress for those affected. However, once drivers are used to the new roads, delays usually go down and can even result in time saved by all.

My family has had a bit of a “changing traffic pattern” in our morning routine with the start of the school year. Our son, Jack, started high school. It’s a charter public school that focuses on the visual arts called G-star. The only issue is the school is in West Palm Beach and we now have to get up at 5:30 am, to leave the house by 6:00 to get him to a 6:20 train to a bus that gets him to school by 7:10 am.
When we discovered that we’d have to get up so early, I have to admit, I wasn’t exactly psyched and the first week was certainly tough. Poor sleep and challenging mornings caused some minor stress and frustration. The second week was definitely a bit better and I was slowly able to appreciate that I had another hour of life to live each day.
For as long as I have been thinking about and creating goals for my “adult” self, I have had the desire to live in a home where I can wake up and drink my morning coffee while watching the Sun rise out of the ocean. I believed this one goal was a bit out of my reach for now, but discovered, after a forced change of routine, I was wrong. Now in the mornings (when it’s my turn), after dropping Jack at the train, I continue on to the beach. I park and walk to the surf, sit down and watch the magnificence of the birth of a new day. Not the way I planned to achieve a goal, but I am thankful for the serendipity of life and my own changing traffic patterns.
Challenges and opportunities are all around us. A small change in your focus can change your world.
Have a great September everyone!
P.S. Jack likes the school so far (fingers crossed) and loves riding the train. 🙂

Eric Sunrise

There and Back

Eric Beach Sunrise

Sometimes, as I watch the sun rise and bring light slowly to the world, I close my eyes and quiet my mind enough to let it run.  My thoughts flatten and spread out to infinity like the smooth surface of the ocean.

As I expand outward through the universe, I become smaller. Just a hint of life sitting by an arc of a tear on a tiny blue marble spinning impossibly close to a bright speck of fire in an immense cold black void.  Farther and farther I go and smaller and smaller I become.

Yet, when I finally open my eyes… Ahhh there’s the sun!

My journey into the deep dark vacuum is ended in an instant as I’m snapped back to me like a rubberband finally released from an impossible stretch.

There’s warmth and beauty and truth and air… and me, sitting on the sand, profoundly lucky to be part of it all.

My Daughter Woke Up Early Today

My daughter woke up early today. My daughter woke up early because she knew today is a special day. She knows that it is a special day because of an event that occurred 12 years ago.
On September 11, 2001, one of her best friends, Brooke, was born. Today is Brooke’s 12th birthday. Hannah and her friends will decorate Brooke’s locker at school before she gets there. They baked brownies to share and they will sing to her.
Hannah knows about the terrible tragedy that also happened on that day. Even though she was not alive, she has an understanding of the horror and she possesses a low level dread knowing that evil people exist in the world. We talk about 9/11. She does not get all the complexities of the situation, but she knows it was a very very sad day for our nation.
But today, she chooses to celebrate. Celebrate life. Celebrate the life of her friend. Celebrate joy. The joy of decorating a locker and singing happy birthday.
So, my wish for all of us, is to remember that day. Remember that day that changed everything. But, remember too, that that was not the only thing that happened. Life also began that day.
My daughter woke up early today. May we all wake up early to have a little more time. A little more time to remember, but also to celebrate life.
Peace be with you all.

hannah 

A Good Candle – Thoughts on my father in law’s passing

Dr. Richard Shelling and Yartzhiet Candle
Dr. Richard Shelling and Yartzheit Candle

A good candle burns smooth and clean. The flame blazing, yet consistent. A good candle loses nothing by lighting another candle. Its power is not lessened. Its brilliance is not challenged. Its fire kindles another, flares briefly with the union, and then settles back to itself. A good candle’s wick is perfectly centered. It burns straight and true. A good candle is formed from pure wax that is all consumed leaving no trace when, at last, its flame turns to a drift of smoke and ghostly fades away. What is left is the radiance and vitality of all the other candles touched by its existence as they burn on.

My father in law, Dick Shelling, was a great candle. His light brought three wonderful children into this world. He continues to shine in their eyes and those of his 7 beautiful grandchildren. His fire is active and thriving in his three stepsons as well as the thousands of patients and their families his skill as a healer and mentor touched.

His flame was buffeted with gusts of life and puffs of fate, but he was centered in his being and his firm sense of right and service. He remained constant and strong and bright.

He lived a modest and purposeful life. His accomplishments are storied and he left us with no regrets when his flame finally slept.

His warmth and energy live on. His love and power are not extinguished, they have just been transformed and transferred. I feel him now. I love him now. He will ever continue to be a guiding light in my world and all who knew him.

He was a good friend. He was a great doctor. He was the best dad and Poppy.

We burn in his honor.

Habitat Gala Speech

Image

Good evening. It’s a great pleasure to be here and I want to thank Habitat for Humanity for giving me this honor and recognizing the work done by our company, Capitol Lighting.
So, how did it come to be that a little Jewish boy from New Jersey who sells lights for a living ends up being honored by a big international Christian Ministry that builds houses. Well, my parents, by their thoughts and deeds, showed me to live in a way where I always look for what connects us, rather than what can divide us.
It is easy to focus on differences, if that is the lense you choose the view the world through. The color of our skin, the kind of clothes we wear, if we had a car or if we had to take the bus, if we believe in one god, or many or none. If we had one parent, or many or none.
If one elevates their thinking just a little bit, we come to realize that the small differences between us are easily dwarfed by the commonalities we all share.
The quality of a person is not made up by who they know, what they have or how they look, but by who they are, what they create and how they can add to the lives of others.
Capitol Lighting was founded in 1924 by my great grandparents, Max and Ethel Lebersfeld. Max was a master craftsman working with the first generation of American electricians. He would tear up the ornate parque floors of his well to do customers and replace their gas pipes with electrical wiring. He made them the promise that if they could find where he took up their floorboards, they didn’t have to pay him. As far as I can tell, this was the first “money back guarantee” in history.
Ethel was the wise one who decided that we should open a store and sell the light fixtures too. Together, they started Capitol Lighting and began our mission to make lives brighter.
They did this literally and figuratively. For almost 90 years, Capitol Lighting has been on a quest of making the lives of our customers, our communities, our vendors and most importantly, our employees – brighter.
We know “why” we’re here and constantly strive improve on what we have to do to live our “why.”
Habitat’s stated mission is that of “building hope with homes.” They are also clear about their “why.” Their organization is filled with dedicated and passionate people striving to provide deserving and hard working families with an incredible gift. They also have provided me personally and every member of my team who has worked on a habitat project the gift allowing us to do a mitzvah – a good deed.
So it seems that Habitat is also is the business of making lives brighter, but they just do it … with houses.
Our goals are aligned and Capitol’s and Habitat’s working together makes all the sense in world.
This past year, with the help of our spokesperson, Rob Van Winkle, also known as Vanilla Ice, our Making Lives Brighter campaign has donated well over $100,000 to Habitat and we look forward for that good work to continue.
So thank you again to Habitat for Humanity for allowing Capitol Lighting the opportunity to support your good work for it allows us to fulfill our mission while helping you fulfill yours.
Thank you all for being here tonight. Thank you to Mike Campbell, director of Habitat and Ana Vento of Vento Designs for making tonight such a success. Have a great rest of the evening.”

Growing Older, But Never Up

Growing older, but never up!  Age is just a number and maturity is just a state of mind. As each year passes, I still feel basically the same as I did in this picture from my birthday in 6th grade.  I really don’t think my brain has changed all that much.  Granted, this often causes behavior leading to much frustration and embarrassment of my wife and kids. Sorry. ☺<br />
Thank you for all the great birthday wishes yesterday.  It’s definitely one of the best things about Facebook.  That said, if “sleep is the rehearsal for death” as Socrates is to have postulated, then waking up each day can be thought to be your “re-birth.”  Following that stretchy line of thinking, than every day is my birthday, or perhaps my “re-birthday.”<br />
I can eat cake and blow out candles and feel good because people care about me every day.  That’s right! From now on, every damn day is my birthday!!<br />
My neighbor’s daughter is turning 8 today and there’s a party going on at her home right now.  There’s a bounce house and she’s running around and screaming.  Dogs are barking.  There’s the sound of laughter and joy.<br />
Laughter and joy. Two of the best things ever.  Well, since today is my birthday again, I’ll resolve to fill it with all good feelings.  If the Jets win, there will be slightly more joy.  If I’m with friends, there’ll be slightly more laughter.<br />
Love, laughter, joy, pain, worry, anticipation, satisfaction, uncertainty, hope - all the myriad of threads that are knitted together with the dueling needles of stress and peace to bind them in the mosaic pattern that is each one of us.  Enjoy the day!  It’s your re-birthday too!
Growing older, but never up! Age is just a number and maturity is just a state of mind. As each year passes, I still feel basically the same as I did in this picture from my birthday in 6th grade. I really don’t think my brain has changed all that much. Granted, this often causes behavior leading to much frustration and embarrassment of my wife and kids. Sorry. ☺
Thank you for all the great birthday wishes yesterday. It’s definitely one of the best things about Facebook. That said, if “sleep is the rehearsal for death” as Socrates is to have postulated, then waking up each day can be thought to be your “re-birth.” Following that stretchy line of thinking, than every day is my birthday, or perhaps my “re-birthday.”
I can eat cake and blow out candles and feel good because people care about me every day. That’s right! From now on, every damn day is my birthday!!
My neighbor’s daughter is turning 8 today and there’s a party going on at her home right now. There’s a bounce house and she’s running around and screaming. Dogs are barking. There’s the sound of laughter and joy.
Laughter and joy. Two of the best things ever. Well, since today is my birthday again, I’ll resolve to fill it with all good feelings. If the Jets win, there will be slightly more joy. If I’m with friends, there’ll be slightly more laughter.
Love, laughter, joy, pain, worry, anticipation, satisfaction, uncertainty, hope – all the myriad of threads that are knitted together with the dueling needles of stress and peace to bind them in the mosaic pattern that is each one of us. Enjoy the day! It’s your re-birthday too!

Happy Re-Birthday to Me

Imageppy

Growing older, but never up! Age is just a number and maturity is just a state of mind. As each year passes, I still feel basically the same as I did in this picture from my birthday in 6th grade. I really don’t think my brain has changed all that much. Granted, this often causes behavior leading to much frustration and embarrassment of my wife and kids. Sorry. 
Thank you for all the great birthday wishes yesterday. It’s definitely one of the best things about Facebook. That said, if “sleep is the rehearsal for death” as Socrates is to have postulated, then waking up each day can be thought to be your “re-birth.” Following that stretchy line of thinking, than every day is my birthday, or perhaps my “re-birthday.”
I can eat cake and blow out candles and feel good because people care about me every day. That’s right! From now on, every damn day is my birthday!!
My neighbor’s daughter is turning 8 today and there’s a party going on at her home right now. There’s a bounce house and she’s running around and screaming. Dogs are barking. There’s the sound of laughter and joy.
Laughter and joy. Two of the best things ever. Well, since today is my birthday again, I’ll resolve to fill it with all good feelings. If the Jets win, there will be slightly more joy. If I’m with friends, there’ll be slightly more laughter.
Love, laughter, joy, pain, worry, anticipation, satisfaction, uncertainty, hope – all the myriad of threads that are knitted together with the dueling needles of stress and peace to bind them in the mosaic pattern that is each one of us. Enjoy the day! It’s your re-birthday too!